I hate this day…I hate how for some it can make you feel so alive. And like the day is meant for…to feel in love or to be loved…but for the single it sucks.
Every year I tell myself who cares? All it is a money maker…that’s all…but without fail year after year I let it make me sad for being alone on V-day.
But, I do fall victim…and got to work this morning down and sad. I decided to do another ad on CL…similar to the one last week:
“Where are the guys all my friends meet? I want a guy to wine and dine me. I want a Valentine... Lets go on a few dates, maybe kiss once or twice and like me for me. Help me like them for them. All I’ve met are the guys that want to fool around during the first date...you see I have a 5-6 date rule. I’m not that kind of girl...I want to have fun, see where it can go...eventually LTR...not looking to be married just yet...but am looking for more then being a hook up girl.
I am not thin, I’m not huge either…but I am overweight…a size 16. So if overweight women are a turn off…don’t waste my or your time.
Are there any guys that want to DATE me...see where it can go??”
A lot of times I write these ads…more because one out of the 50 that email me I end up meeting…for example Mr. Martini.
Now let me update you on him shall we. We talked for a few on Saturday…not to much just a few quick emails. On Sunday nothing…Monday we emailed a few times…him claiming to be to busy at work to talk much…which is totally fine and understandable. I did ask him if we made it to a second date and he said, “what would you like to do?” I made some suggestions and then we never made any set date…which seemed odd to me since he was instant last week that we make a date for Friday night. A little different tune this week…but I wasn’t sure if I was being paranoid or not.
Yesterday, I was down about the whole Anchorman night and decided to call Mr. Martini to see if he wanted to do something. He called back leaving less the a 45 second message saying he went to the dentist so no he couldn’t hang out. Ok that was an ok excuse…but like I said maybe it was in my head that he seemed a little distant.
Today I sent an email asking if he was at work…and then did the CL ad.
I get a response from him through email…with the CL ad copied into the body. OK? So…what does that mean really? I emailed him asking…are you pissed?
First of all…I didn’t know how into me he was since…he hasn’t been all that attentive towards me since the Friday night…and we did spend a lot of time together on that First date. So, if he was so taken with me? Why not call? Why go on CL today at all if he was so smitten?
Cause, in the long run…he did go online and browse the ads…to find mine…that had a different title then the ad he replied to. So…he was looking as much as I am when posting. One date does not equal exclusive rights…maybe it would if he was a little more attentive and me not questioning his intentions on Friday night in the first place.
I get an email from him saying: “I think you try to meet people off the web to much that’s not what I am looking for, so take care”
SO I write back and called saying: “wow, I’m sorry...I really don’t meet many people...out of the last ad...you were the only one...and then today I was down because its V-day and I’m alone---so I posted another to see if I could talk to someone while at work...to really meet that person...probably not.
and you were looking too...
I like you... and would like to see you again.
I am a little clueless on the dating game...or else I would know how to be I guess.
I guess I hope you change your mind...or at least talk to me about it.”
But I haven’t heard from him. You know, its probably better this way…he was a little pushy and demanding in a lot of ways---especially on a first date.
I think I was taken with him because he wasn’t Anchorman…and he was cute in his way. I was attracted…I admit it…and there was a connection. A connection that is definitely missing from most first dates I’ve had. But I think I liked more that he met my friends and we all had fun. But he drank so much…and even though in some ways it was like 2 dates in one…he was really really pushy towards the end. I mean yes, he was drunk…but he knew he was on a date…and knew he had to drive. SLOW DOWN.
I just feel like in the end…maybe I did mess up…and maybe I do meet to many people online. I don’t know? He made me feel ashamed actually…like it was my fault…when I really wonder If he had any intentions of seeing me again after we got into his car to drive to mine. I didn’t give out…and at the same time he did get some action if not a lot… which is a little abnormal for me, but he was so PUSHY. On the drive to my car…he was a little cold…and for the first time in my life I felt that feeling of regret the morning after. Like I said…nothing MAJOR happened…but…
Anyway…I did have the last word (in my own head) saying: “good luck to you then...I guess you got what you wanted after all...”
I don’t know…I just have this feeling…and in my ad I do kind of send a challenge out there…that I have a 5 date rule…maybe he just wanted to break it. Or maybe? He’s right…and I did something wrong in sending out another AD…not sure what is right and what is wrong in this picture at this time.
I do know that this Valentines Day for one sexless in the city…was a doozy. Lets hope that one of these days I will make it one day like every other.
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