It's officially over

I talked to Anchorman tonight on IM…damn it…at least he Imed me first, but we talked things out…. and its still over.

I want to soooo bad right now to forget all I have said and send him an IM that says…I’m sorry don’t listen to my evil twin “Kerrie”

But, in the long run…I am going to feel like this again in a few months, weeks, days, hours… so what is a girl to do? Kerrie and KT will have to survive I guess without Anchorman once and for all.

I am sad though…at least I am happy that we talked about it without me just never hearing from him again, and I am not crying about it at least…at least that is done with once and for all…for tonight… for right this second at least.

He doesn’t want more he said…he wants to keep things the way they are. I said its not enough for me though…I want someone who wants breakfast with me at least. I admitted that I thought he was embarrassed of me…he said, “why would I be embarrassed? I just like keeping you to myself. I like it being a secret.” I even brought up the no phone conversation…and he says, “If I call you, will you rethink things?” I did, I admit I was soooo tempted to give in and say hell ok…lets keep having fun. BUT…then I just can’t do it…especially since I am comparing every guy I meet to him…and probably will for a while. But its better for it to end now, before it gets worse…not better….

I’m just sad…. why cant things work out the way I want them to.