Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Male Perspective?

I still have gotten very little responses from Match…and yes that temps me to go back to CL…I know I know I am not going to. But damn it…why doesn’t anyone respond to me.

I was talking with a friend tonight…a male perspective. I don’t know why no one wants to talk to me…and as I was saying this I realized that I have become stronger in the last few months. I don’t regret what happened with Anchorman…it just made me stronger. Now, I want to find a guy who is going to treat me with some respect…in the beginning I definitely let guys treat me pretty bad because I didn’t care…they liked me so what the fuck…why not take some of the abuse right?

But now I know that this isn’t ok, cause at the end of the day I still feel like shit…it might have been an ego boost at first…but what about after?

The only thing I took away from the Match conversation was…I have gotten stronger and pickier with my “old age” but I still think a lot of it has to do with my weight. I have taken a look at myself the last few months…both with the dating and working for Lane Bryant…but it made me realizes that I am beautiful. I don’t have to be Paris’s size to be me. I see size 28 women come into the store…that probably could be the most beautiful women I have ever met. Even the ones that are ashamed of who there are…they are beautiful. It’s the clothes you wear…the style…the hair…the attitude…the whole package that makes a person…and when someone is genuine…they are no matter what. The people that shop at LB are amazing and it made me realize that no matter what…I am me. I am always going to have a weight problem…even if I get down to a size 8…when I have kids…the weight will be back.

Its moments like tonight that make me think about all the people I have met that have inspired me to take another look at myself and see me for me. I just wish guys could do the same thing. I just wish I could grab some of these guys and say what the fuck…you are not Brad Pit…come on be real here…what is wrong with me?

I changed my Match profile again…hoping that maybe the last one was just to long…so this time I shortened…maybe it’s less intimidating and more real? Any thoughts?

I am me. I am smart, funny and LOVE to laugh. I want someone who can enhance my life without being my life.

I have been doing the career world, letting me live in five states in just over five years… I want to live life to the fullest and have fun doing it. I’m shy, but can be the loudest one at the party. I can do a shot with the best of them…a beer with great taste…or a strong stiff drink. I am more of a pub girl verses a club girl. I love going to a new restaurant or trying a Phantom Gourmet favorite.

I love going to the movies…something to loose myself for a few hours…although reading does the same. I don’t mind watching a movie at home...if I have someone to enjoy it with. From Old School to 12 Monkeys to Walk the Line…I can watch any movie once. I love my friends and family, and I am the most loyal person you will meet, the best friend you will have.

I would love for someone who can make me laugh everyday no matter what. I want someone to do things with and to have fun with. I want someone who is passionate about life as much as there work. I want someone who will treat me with the respect I deserve and who can appreciate all I have to offer.

Maybe that’s you?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Keep up the good work.