Friday stalker!

Last Friday night I went to dinner with friends I hadn't seen in 8 years! It was so nice to see them, and connect with someone from my past...to connect with someone you just know had a similar backgrounds growing up. As I was following them to there place after dinner, I thought about texting Mr Friday that I was in his neighborhood...since we were hanging out the following night instead, I knew he had plans with his new roommate.... I asked him actually...since he said he was busy and broke, I thought a low key night was in order. SO I emailed and asked...he said sure, lets do Saturday night.

So...as I was driving to my friends, I drove by someone walking to his car, as I glanced through my window, I saw him...it was Mr. Friday! I started to laugh, and yea my heart did race some...just from the shock...so I decided to call...and even though he was with his roommate and obviously busy, he still answered..."Hey, what's up?" Me, "not much, did you just walk outside?" haha so yea it was him...the stalker that I am!

So, that was a small world moment, him saying, "Well now you know where I live tomorrow night if you come by to watch the movie."

SO, Saturday came...and so did the night. I picked up pizza on my way...and we watched a movie... he was nice... and sweet as usual... it was super comfortable, and I could have just stayed...maybe it was the beer and the good company.

I will be honest and say I am still not so sure yet. I def am liking him...and when I think about him he does put a smile on my face...but at times I think...what am I feeling really? Comfort or attraction? Is it like because he obviously is interested and maybe I like the attention and that for once someone is into ME!

I know I enjoy his company...and maybe his kiss did have a little bit more heat this time, but...I guess I will see as time goes on. Maybe I am waiting for the donkey or pig I usually date...that I am just not used to it...its confusing cause I am usually more worried how they are feeling rather then analyzing my own feelings. My own feelings have been second for so long, that sometimes I don't know how to think for me.

Its not just in guys, its my whole life. I worry about everyone, from roommates and family to coworkers and friends...what they think matters to me. I would rather someone be happy...as long as that is the case then I am at ease. Am I happy?? Hmmm...I don't know...I am just more at ease...until someone frowns that is.

I have been really working on trying not to be this way anymore. I have been making an effort to live my life rather then someone else's. Because as we all know its "MY LIFE" no one else's...for me that is. SO, if this is the case...maybe I am just scared and don't know how to feel this way...feel this "MY LIFE" thing that everyone else knows about.

OR...is it him and maybe we just don't click...or do we?